Hello

This is Jason, Communications & Technical Assistant to Magnus Turner MP. I just wanted to say thank you to all the people who have sent messages to Mr. Turner which didn’t threaten violence against him. Many people have asked whether he was successful in last night’s General Election and so far as I know, he was. He’s been celebrating his victory most of this week, since long before polling day, and he’s usually right about these things. However, he hasn’t been seen since the early hours of this morning. I was just arriving for work when he stormed out of the house, shouting “Douglas Alexander’s lost his seat now. Although I’m sure he’ll deny it”.

It is believed he took an early flight to an undisclosed location. So if you’re reading this in a warm country, could you please look out for him and ask him to call me or his wife? I would be happy to provide a list of countries in which he has property or business interests if that would help.

I know that he had been concerned throughout the campaign that his party, the Liberal Democrats, may find themselves playing a slightly reduced role in the new government, and in recent weeks, he would occasionally invite me into the room he had recently renamed his McStudy, to have a chat while playing Proclaimers albums. He was considering crossing the floor again, but as he’s already been a member of the Conservatives and Labour, his options were narrowing. I don’t think his concentration was helped by the constant emails and voice messages from some lady who just kept shouting at him “Leave us alone. You’re not even Scottish”.

He also said to me that he was considering standing as an Independent – and may even have done so for all I know, although he was struggling to find a single issue to campaign on. He told me he’d heard two or three people had done quite well on the issue of hospital closures. He just couldn’t decide which hospital he wanted to close down.

I’m sure he’ll explain all this in person at some point, and he’s bound to be home in time for the upcoming vote on MPs’ 11% pay rise; he’s been looking forward to that one.

Until then, thank you for your vote and for your concern.

Jason

Communications & Technical Assistant to Magnus Turner MP